Deaf Knell

Dating service questionnaire

2010-07-29T14:47:00.001-07:00

I hereby announce the launching of my internet dating service, temporarily named No Fatties. Here is a sample from the questionnaire that I'll be using in order to provide excellent matches and/or help the FBI profile serial killers. Leave your responses in the comments; I'll also accept write-in responses on any of the questions.

1.) I am...

A man seeking women
A man seeking men
A woman seeking men
A woman seeking women
Whatever

2.) Which of these qualities are you most looking for in a partner?

A lack of visible sores and lesions
Yelling proficiency
Low standards and/or self-esteem
Progressive views on illicit sex acts

3.) Choose all options which apply to you.

Desperate
Lonely
Ugly
A hit at parties

4.) What's your idea of a perfect date?

Attending a documentary about the plight of left-handed albino fishermen in the Philippines
Listening to someone drunkenly complain about their exes
A high speed chase across state lines
Unfulfilling sexual encounter in a bar restroom stall

5.) Which best describes your political leanings?

Centrist
Conservative
Liberal
Team Edward

6.) If you were a book, what kind of book would you be?

A ponderous and unreadable Russian novel
A fast-paced blend of action, romance and wishful thinking
A fantasy story about gay hobbits
An issue of Ass Factory with the pages stuck together

Now, this is an ostensibly free service, but you will get no vaguely relevant matches unless you sign up for one of our Silver, Gold, or Irradiated Platinum memberships. But don't worry! Your satisfaction is guaranteed or I will pretend to feel badly when spending your money.

The operator of No fatties, hereafter referred to as Joshua Davis, Awesomesauce Esquire is in no way legally responsible for anything, anywhere. You snooze, you lose.

Scenes from a Multiverse (webcomic)

2010-07-18T15:37:00.000-07:00

My newest webcomic find is Scenes from a Multiverse by Jonathan Rosenberg. The gimicky thing about this comic is that the author takes a weekly poll of the audience to choose the setting and characters of future strips.

Scenes is a science-fiction strip set in a "an ordinary, everyday multiverse." Each day's comic takes place in a different location, in any one of the many goofy parallel universes, and with different zany alien characters. A new comic appears each weekday and on Friday there is a poll on the best of that week. The next Friday's strip is then a continuation of the scene in the winning strip of the poll. A popular scene can then be continued for several weeks. The strip on the last three Fridays has been set in the Inner Science Rings, Branes of Curiosity. These strips have been following the trials of ScienceMaster Adler whose first appearance is found here. It looks like Adler's strip will win again this week so we'll see more of him next Friday.

It's fairly funny, if not completely hilarious, with the punchline in the mouse-over alt-text probably the funniest part of a strip in a laugh-out-loud way. However the settings themselves, which are completely new at least four days a week, are the most rewarding features of the strip. Besides providing a new style of artwork in each setting, they often have funny or interesting themes. The setting names are usually good gags, too, so don't neglect to find the locale in the gray bar above. Also, the artwork is pretty colorful and crisp and it's all rather professionally done. All in in all, I'd say this is definitely worth checking out.

Readings of "The Raven"

2010-07-11T09:44:00.000-07:00

I'm a big fan of Edgar Allan Poe's The Raven. Like all great poetry, it is best to read aloud or listen to another reading aloud. I read it aloud myself quite often -- I've almost memorized it -- and I have on DVD the famous Halloween episode of The Simpsons, in which James Earl Jones does a partial reading. I was on the bus thinking about trying to find some other performances when I remembered in which century I lived and so popped out of my iPhone and opened up Youtube. Some of my findings are below:

First we have a classic reading by Vincent Price. This clip is clearly from an old TV show and while the production values are pretty low and can elicit a few giggles, Price's delivery is, well, priceless.
Next up we have the incomparable Christopher Walken. Walken could probably read the phone book out loud and it would be entertaining and, as expected, his performance in this clip is great. However, there is a musical accompaniment in the clip which, although often low and unobtrusive, sometimes becomes a distraction. There's one point in particular where electric guitars start to wail like a Slayer concert that I had to laugh out loud. I would much rather simply have Walken's reading. But I believe that this audio might actually be from Lou Reed's project (see below).
You can't have a list of people talking without an appearance by James Earl Jones. This is a straight-up reading without any musical or video accompaniment. It is a good, deliberate reading with great cadence, but emotionally is somewhat flat. Anyway, a good listen.
This is an interesting item by Lou Reed. It is not The Raven proper but a reworked version with mostly the same rhythm and many of the original passages, although often with different meaning in their new contexts. On Wikipedia I found that in 2003 Lou Reed released a 2-Disc set "consisted of songs written by Reed and spoken-word performances of reworked and rewritten texts of Edgar Allan Poe by the actors, set to electronic music composed by Reed." Presumably this clip, and maybe the Christopher Walken one, are from that album.

Well, that's enough for now. Tell me in the comments if you find any other good ones.

Activity, already.

2010-07-04T10:40:00.001-07:00

Wow, I haven't posted in literally (figuratively) forever. I would like to say that I've been busy, but the worn out buttons on my PS2 controller testify otherwise, betraying me yet again. Et tu, Sony?

I suppose that when I feel like writing, I don't come here but rather just bang out a few trenchant observations (read: dick jokes) into one of my many, many open writing projects. These projects are open in the way the universe is, i.e. expanding forever with no foreseeable end.

At any rate, I'm making a July 4th resolution, or something, that I'll try to post here a bit more. So if you've recently arrived and the date stamp on this post is not significantly past the point where you would still drink identically date-stamped milk, then come back shortly. But if, on the other hand, the blog has turned sour just pour it down the sink and run hot water to get rid of the smell and extended metaphor.

As an activity to hold you over, I'm trying to come up with titles for my business card. So far, I have:

Sophist
Auto-clast
Independent Filmgoer
Freelance Napper
Fact-ator
High Wizard of the Sundered Realm
Level 16 Nerd, neutral good

Some nifty things to do with the iPad

2010-01-28T18:47:00.000-08:00

While generating much excitement, the new release from Apple has also elicited criticism in some circles for its limited functionally. We provide here a small set of new and distinct uses for the iPad:

Acts as a regular iPod Touch for people with very fat fingers. Also for frost giants and Bigfoot, if he exists.
Use it to check your email while your real computer boots up.
Increase the speed at which you make purchases on iTunes.
Can be used as a serving platter for pictures of food.
Lord it over people who don't care.
Comically hold to your ear and loudly say, "Can you hear me now?"
Gotta have 'em all!
Something to talk about incessantly in lieu of getting a real hobby.

Things I want to hear the Incredible Hulk roar in rage

2010-01-02T14:25:00.000-08:00

It helps if you read the following out loud in a Hulk voice.

Hulk divest!
Girl make Hulk nervous!
Hulk sleepy!
Hulk make Jesus personal Lord and savior!
Hulk stub toe!
Opposing political view make Hulk mad!
Hulk like kitten!
Hulk unlikely poet!
No one comment on Hulk LiveJournal!
Hulk excellent speller!
That make Hulk truculent!
Hulk tweet!
Hulk informed consumer!
Hulk other car piece of shit too!
Hulk tap that!
Hulk skeptical of health care reform!
Joke about pants not ripping make Hulk mad!
Hulk have date! Meet online!

Yes, my interest is Kindled

2009-12-27T16:36:00.000-08:00

I just finished my first read, Dickens' A Christmas Carol, on the Amazon Kindle. My dad gave me the Kindle for Christmas and, though I wouldn't have bought one for myself, I think it's a pretty great device and that it's an awesome gift. I have the Global version, which is good since I live in Canadia (I'm pretty sure that dad didn't think about this before clicking on "buy" so it really is a bit of luck there) with a 6" screen. I wasn't previously aware that there is a DX version with like a 9.5" screen. I think I would like the smaller one that I have better since it would be more portable but I've yet to hold the DX in my hands.

The configuration of the device is the 6" screen, with a keypad below that. To the right of the keypad is a little joystick for navigating the device menus. The basic interface of "turning pages" is done with dedicated buttons on either side of the device. There are also speakers and a earphone jack for audiofiles. Finally, a mini-USB port can link it to a computer.

The Kindle has a nice feel in the hands although it reminds me of those things they are always reading from on Star Trek. The screen is smallish but since you can adjust text size, this doesn't really matter. The screen is pretty soft and easy on the eyes, not like a computer display. On the other hand, it requires exterior light to read and the glare is only reduced so much. The controls are nice and you can basically hold the device and "turn pages" with one hand (either right or left) leaving your other hand free to hold a martini, for instance. Another nice feature is the built-in dictionary, which provides short entries at the bottom of the screen if you highlight a word with the joystick.

I don't know how many e-books that I realistically am going to buy. I like the feel of physical books and the sight of them on my bulging bookshelves. But one can get many old books for free since they are now public domain. Further, it will be very useful for perusing PDFs of papers and whatnot while I'm traveling or commuting. I'm hoping that a little digging around online and talking to other Kindle users will provide me with more ideas on its use.

Comic reviews -- Preacher

2009-12-08T19:50:00.000-08:00

One of the first stores I found when I moved to Vancouver was a comic shop just down the street from my apartment. Although a nerd, I've never read much in the way of comics, just an issue of Spiderman occasionally when I was a kid. But when the Watchmen movie came out recently, I was inspired to read the original graphic novel and I really enjoyed it. So it was only a matter of time before I stopped in the neighborhood comic shop and checked out some other things. With the exception of a short-run series of the X-Men's Storm as a kid, everything has been pretty good. Let me tell you a little about what I've been reading.

If you follow my Twitter feed, you've probably seen a few of my tweets regarding Preacher. Put simply and objectively, Preacher kicks ass. In the intro to the third volume, Penn Jillette of Penn & Teller fame has this to say, "...had all the things I love -- tits, fucking, and things blowing up." That doesn't say it all, but gets quite a bit of it.

Preacher follows the adventures of Jesse Custer, a hard-fightin', hard-cussin' man of the cloth; his crack-shot girlfriend Tulip; and, of course, Cassidy, their good buddy who's a 100 year-old vampire from Ireland. Jesse is on a mission to find God, who has apparently taken leave of heaven and is more or less on the run in the mortal world. It even appears like God may be a bit afeared of ol' Jesse since the preacher has been infused with the power of the incredible being, Genesis, the offspring of an angel and a devil. On this mission Jesse, Tulip and Cassidy run into an amazing and memorable cast of characters as they hunt down God to make Him answer for why He made such a fucked up world.

The artwork is colorful and vibrant. It is definitely not sanitized and a number of the scenes will certainly stick in your memory. Preacher is not for the faint of heart. It's brutal and, at times, plain sadistic. You will be shocked. But it is much more than just another push on the envelope. This comic will definitely leave you with things to think about and it's just damn entertaining to boot. I'm in the middle of the series at present (it's about 36 issues in total) so I can't tell you if it all pulls together well in the end. But I am definitely enjoying the ride.

I've got a few of other series that I've been following so expect to see some more posts on comics in the future.

Movie preview

2009-12-07T20:53:00.000-08:00

During my time in L.A., I developed a number of contacts in "the biz." The following titles of upcoming releases were recently leaked to me:

Pop Culture Shout Out 3

An Animated Rat Becomes King or Whatever

Actioner 2 : The Awesoming

Retread : The Sequel

Honey, Where Are My Fucking Keys?

You're Cute. No, You Are

Disgraced Celebrity : The Real Story

Hip-Hop Soundtrack Movie

An American Jingo

Diva Thinks She Can Act

Knock-Off 2 : Legally Distinct

We Love Love

Slut Valley High

Sports Montage

Aquaman : The Best Superheroes Already Have Movies

Little Bobby's Story : An Inspiring Downer

Book, the Movie

Frenchie, the Dog Who Delivers Babies

Cram It! True Story of the American Olympic Debate Team

Bikini Murder Island

Carnage, the Musical

The Creature That Ate the Supporting Characters

In the Red : Street Accountancy

Slaughterhouse Jive

Murder, She Tweeted

Quickie comic plug

2009-10-19T15:31:00.000-07:00

I've been meaning to do a longer webcomic post but haven't gotten around to it. Nevertheless, let me quickly recommend Cyanide and Happiness over at Explosm. You can find the link to the latest comic at the upper right of the Explosm home page. This was recommended to me by my friend Dave and, like him, is crazy and gross and wrong. A prime example would be this. As warning, do not read this comic if you are offended by anything. Seriously, just reading this will make your grandmother cry.

Now this is just about the most tasteless comic that I've ever encountered so, naturally, I love it. But the recent instance that prompted me to this little post isn't bad at all but still completely hilarious. Check it out.

Greener Pasture'd

2009-10-01T22:33:00.000-07:00

It's been a month or so since I posted last and it's been busy indeed. So I have an actual excuse for not posting instead of previously when I've just been a lazy fuck.

Firstly, the trip up here was very nice when I wasn't worrying about stuff. I shipped my stuff off in a moving truck and my dad and I drove up in my car. We took the scenic route, the Pacific Coastal Highway, or PCH, which follows the California coast almost to the inch. It's ridiculously gorgeous and the mood was enhanced by an almost continuous soundtrack of Zeppelin and CCR. We set an easy pace for a while, and stopped for about a day in Frisco for some excellent seafood. But we dawdled in Cali for perhaps too long, so once we hit Oregon, we quit the coast and took the freeway until we crossed the border and finally entered Vancouver.

One of the first things we did upon getting to my new apartment was to meet a neighbor, Camilla, in the hallway. She invited us to a party that night and I had a great opportunity to meet a bunch of locals, including some rather fetching lasses. So, you know, win.

It's taken me a little while but the apartment is basically settled. Unpacked except for some of the more rarely used kitchen gadgets. Got the cable TV and some internets. Work is still a bit unsettled, as I haven't yet a permanent office and a bunch of my work books are still at my apartment. But I'm settled in enough to have resumed research which is what they pay me the big bucks for.

I've been in Vancouver for almost a month now and it is quite a place. I've never been in an urban environment which is also simultaneously so naturally picturesque. I need to get up to the mountains and take a hike soon or maybe take a drive up north to Whistler.

Anyway, that's the status report. But what is far more interesting is the Non-Adventures of Wonderella. You definitely don't need to read them in order but you might as well start with the first one before flipping around the archive. Wonderella is, of course, modeled on Wonder Woman, but the similarity stops there. Wonder Woman fights for truth and justice or whatever. Wonderella likes fast food and smoothies. Read it, losers.

Oh, and you better be watching The Guild since Wil Wheaton plays a fouled mouthed, kilt-wearing MMORPGer in the third season.

Greener pastures

2009-08-30T12:29:00.000-07:00

Well, it's been quite a while since I last posted, over a month in fact. I've been pretty busy preparing to move to Vancouver, which will be in just a few days. This is just a quick post saying goodbye to LA. I can't say that it's been very good to me, but I'm sure to miss some things and I feel a little guilty about not exploring the city more. I'm definitely looking forward to getting about more in Vancouver.

Sound off

2009-07-26T13:05:00.001-07:00

Oy, is anyone reading this? Comment!

They are so cute at that age (Webcomics)

2009-07-22T13:03:00.000-07:00

Here's another time sink for you, a webcomic called Snowflakes, brought to us by James Ashby, Chris Jones and Zach Weiner. You may remember Zach as the author of my favorite webcomic, Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, but Snowflakes is decidedly less edgy than that (in fact, I'd describe it as PG-rated at worst) although still fairly irreverent and usually pretty funny. It's a storyline comic about a bunch of kids living in an orphanage operated by nuns. My favorite character is Wray, the black-haired girl advocating torture in the strip above, who you can tell has a sort of warped sense of things and a bit of a short fuse. I suggest starting at the beginning since there is a bit of a storyline (you can find the archive here) but there's only about 50 strips so far so it won't take long to catch up. Snowflakes updates three days a week and I encourage you to put it in your feed reader and follow along in the fun!

Unshelved (Webcomics)

2009-07-12T11:46:00.000-07:00

I haven't been posting much lately and the timing is nice for this one, so let's do another webcomic. In honor of the American Library Association meeting in Chicago this weekend, which I know of due to a friend's Twitter feed and the website that I'm currently introducing, I want to bring to your attention Unshelved, a comic about public libraries which I've mentioned before. You are probably already wetting yourself laughing with thoughts of all of the hi-jinks at your local public library, but nonetheless I assure you that Unshelved is worth your time. It hosts a cast of great characters from wise-cracking comic aficionado Dewey to Buddy, a guy in a beaver suit, to the naked libertarian lawyer Ned.

Unshelved has a typical newspaper comic format: a daily three-panel black and white strip with a longer, color version on Sundays. With the exception of Sundays, the strip focuses on the antics of the characters and varies from fairly funny to hilarious. But the highlight is the Sunday "Book Club" strips which provide a little comic teaser for a book. The books can be old or new, for different age groups, of different genres, and are often done by guest artists or writers. Here's an excellent one about Moby Dick by Zach Weiner of SMBC, although they are usually a little less satirical. Today's Book Club about Vonnegut's Sirens of Titan is also done by a guest artist, Box Brown of bellen!, which I may post about in the future.

Unshelved has been around for a while, and in fact they used to be called Overdue. They have a substantial archive dating back to 2002, and even better have a separate archive of the color Sunday Book Club comics. Finally, they have stuff to buy, too, like some funny shirts and books.

Warbot is Hell (Webcomics)

2009-07-09T15:39:00.000-07:00

Today I wanted to tell you all about Warbot in Accounting (WiA), shown on the left, brought to us by the good people at Nuklear Power. This is a very good, but infrequently updated, comic following the life of the titular decomissioned Warbot as he persues his new career in the business world. Warbot is silent, huge, and ridiculously slow. To conform with Warbot's pace, the comic tends to be somewhat long and slow-paced itself (the last one had 22 panels in 11 rows) and there is very little dialog. But this is all part of the joke, so don't rush through a strip but rather savor each panel and the often subtle differences between panels. The other part of the joke is the general misfit nature of warbot in his new life and his sad attempts to fit in. Although pretty funny, Warbot can also be a bit of a downer, which is no small feat using a character with no dialog or facial expressions. One last note: the artwork is pretty good and is detail-oriented. The details really make it work so don't miss out (see his little tie in the panel above).

While you are at Nuklear Power, you might be interested in checking out some other things there. They have the regularly updated 8-Bit Theater, but I can't say that I've really gotten into it. The art is ripped directly from Final Fantasy, which is kind of funny at first and then annoying after a while. But I can recommend Atomic Robo. This is a full-fledged newstand comic book which they have some samples of which are pretty good. I found their navigation kind of confusing so I'll just put the links to the sample comics here and here. I think the second one is hysterical.

An assload of bull

2009-06-29T21:27:00.000-07:00

We all know that a group of crows is called a murder. But, while perusing lists of random shit in the back of my thesaurus, I learned the following names for groups of animals (and some of my own comments):

baboons: congress (don't fucking get me started)
bears: sloth (that's just needlessly insulting to bears. I suggest a "colbert")
birds: dissimulation, flight, volary (uh, flock?)
boars: singular, sounder (Singular? A group of anything is called a singular?)
eagles: convocation (eagles are pretty stuck-up)
ferrets: business (just weird)
hedgehogs: prickle (why not call a group of kittens an "adorable?)
owls: parliament, wisdom (I dare you to find these in use anywhere)
polar bears: aurora (now you're just being cutesy)
rhinoceroses: crash (ok, now you're being cute)
skunks: stench (alright, fuck you)
turtledoves: pitying (is that even the right tense? It's like being named a present tense verb. I'm looking at you, Sting)
unicorns: blessing (whatever)

The Tree Show

2009-06-21T18:39:00.000-07:00

I got myself a little birthday present today, a book on the art of Mark Ryden, called The Tree Show. Specifically, the book is the catalog of his 2007 LA exhibition of the same name. You can flip through some of his work in the paintings section over at his official site but the cover to the left gives an accurate idea of the theme, which is "creepy children". You may find the style a little familiar and that's probably because he has a done a ton of commercial art including album covers and book covers. I recalled, in particular, the Stephen King novel, Desperation.

For you budding illusionists...

2009-06-19T15:33:00.000-07:00

What kind of blogger would I be if I didn't provide more links to other people's content? Today I want to encourage you to take a look at Mighty Optical Illusions. As the name suggests, this site is devoted to optical illusions. If you think that stuff is fun, then check it out. To pique your interest, first take a look at the puzzle above. The first picture has 8 eggs while the second, a simple rearrangement of the pieces of the first, has only 7. Oh nos!

Webcomics Update

2009-06-13T22:16:00.000-07:00

The above is brought to you by Peter Chiykowski at Rock, Paper, Cynic. Funny stuff often, but sometimes there are some groaners and fanboy video game stuff. But check it out! In addition to the comic (updated each weekday) he has some fiction and music although I haven't dug into that stuff yet.

Inertia and Gravity are Fucked Up

2009-06-05T21:56:00.000-07:00

I mentioned Abstruse Goose in my last post but I had to point out this one since I have similar feelings all the time. The thing that most usually prompts such feelings in me is looking at the moon. Intellectually, I understand that the moon's motion is simply determined by an attraction to the earth and the conservation of angular momentum (I understand it better than you, in fact). That's actually pretty amazing itself. But also, it just looks like a big fucking rock just sitting there in the sky. This is especially pronounced to me when one can see it during the daytime. I guess this strikes me particularly because, unlike the stars which are too far away to see very well, and the Sun which is just too damn bright, the moon doesn't look like anything besides a big fucking rock. In the sky. Just hanging there. Over your head. Every night. Fuck.

Abstruse Goose (Webcomics)

2009-05-30T22:46:00.000-07:00

Just a quick post with a new webcomic to link to. This installment is Abstruse Goose. It's pretty geeky but in a way which is much funnier than xkcd, although much less likely to be understood outside of math/CS/physics circles. However, this one I think has some universal appeal (and the equation's true).

And thanks to Esko for pointing out this comic to me.

We can rebuild him

2009-05-22T19:59:00.000-07:00

I was outfitted today with a high-tech physical enhancement system, an external opto-mechanical device known as "glasses". I trust that I look dashing.

Photo-Op

2009-05-20T14:03:00.000-07:00

I don't know the context of this photo, such as who the guy on the left is, if Biden was VP at the time, or if it's even real. But I would like to think that I'm citizen of a country great enough that it's sitting vice-president would be photographed shaking hands with a guy wearing a t-shirt featuring the impending mortal combat of a werewolf and a unicorn.

BTW, the above picture was obtained here. Also, I'm going to marry this girl if only to see if I can get a Tanooki Suit out of that box.

Speaking of...

2009-05-18T22:37:00.000-07:00

Having just recently been describing SMBC, I'd be remiss in not pointing out this most recent comic. Don't forget to check out the votey by clicking the red button!

Finally, a Doctor more impressive than House (Webcomics)

2009-05-17T13:30:00.000-07:00

Here's another round of webcomics. In this case I'll just introduce you to one, The Adventures of Dr. McNinja. Now if this sounds completely ridiculous to you, then you must be listening. Dr. McNinja lives up to his name, as a ninja and a medical doctor who is apparently also Irish (not to give anything away, but there are shamrock throwing-stars at one point). The good doctor has many crazy adventures with Judy (a gorilla and his receptionist), Gordito (his gunslinging and moustachioed child sidekick, who rides a velociraptor), and the whole crazy-ass McNinja family that tries to kill him occasionally since they are embarassed by his profession (the doctor part, at least).

The Adventures are published online in comic book form, meaning it comes in several separate issues, each of which is its own...adventure. The current issue is updated a page at a time, three times a week. I'm behind at the moment, since I haven't been reading the current issue, but I've read the dozen or so back issues and they are worth your time, assuming your time is worth less than mine.

One more thing, like many good webcomics, this one comes equipped with an online store with various T-shirts. These are by far some of the funniest and most awesome T-shirts ever. I could not pass up this one. Unfortunately, it was way smaller than I anticipated and fits, uh...fitfully. If I order another I'll pay more attention to their sizing chart, or eat fewer pizzas topped with White Castle cheeseburgers.

Webcomics roundup

2009-05-10T13:36:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned in another post, I read a lot of webcomics so I thought I'd post a little about that. There's a variety of stuff to find online but, this being the internext, you may not be surprised that it skews towards the nerdly and weird. Let's jump in:

I probably don't have to mention xkcd. This is simply because if you'd like it, you've probably already heard of it. Generally pretty nerdy, with my favorite being this one. Can be hit or miss and occasionally sappy.

You may not be aware of Dresden Codak. This can also skew to the nerdy but more often to the mystic. The artwork is also pretty great. Check it out. In general, this isn't a particularly funny comic but rather just has cool ideas, art and characters. It recently concluded a very long and neat story arc called "Hob," which begins here. But before diving into that you should tool around a little in the archives to get a sense of the characters. There are no other story arcs so just pick one at random that doesn't have "Hob" in the title.

Next up is Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, or SMBC. SMBC is one of my absolute favorites. It's got no story arcs or characters, just one-off jokes. They are almost always funny, sometimes spectacularly so. The topics of humor can be just about anything but expect the weird and/or profane and/or gruesome. Also great science jokes. It would be impossible for me to pick a single favorite SMBC, but this one speaks to me. One more thing, after you read a given SMBC, look for a little dark red circle below the comic and to the right (not all SMBCs have one but the link in the last sentence does). Clicking on this button reveals a black & white "votey" comic, an extra punchline to the main comic. These extra gags are sometimes much funnier than the main joke.

The next offering, Questionable Content, is a little different from the previous ones. This one is way more character and storyline based and not necessarily as funny. The artwork really evolves over time as does the focus of the strip. But the main gist of it is a group of young adults, cracking wise and talking about music in between bouts of drunkeness. It started out with a big indie rocker theme but the obscure band jokes have died out a bit and it should be readable by anyone. My favorite character, by the way, is Hannelore (or Hanners). She started off a little boring but has come out of her shell a bit. I like her because she has the best expressions, with some recent examples here, here and here. The second link is indeed drunk sledding on cafeteria trays, and is my current desktop wallpaper.

OK, that's enough for now. I've got a bunch more of these, so I'll probably do another post like this in the future.

Check out "The Crew"

2009-05-04T18:33:00.000-07:00

In case you have not found enough things on the Interslice to waste your little life away, I recommend The Crew. It's a webseries composed of live action episodes, each a few minutes in length. It's billed as a sci-fi comedy. I would describe it as The Office on a spaceship. It has the same documentary style with confessional-type interviews and a lot of humor driven by an incompetent and awkward boss. I like it although I admit it is not the funniest thing ever. Anyway, you can find the main site here.

Anyone else know of any good webseries? I read webcomics a lot but haven't ever shopped around for shows.

Update: After posting this I dug around some more and found The Guild, which is kind of like if the people from The Office played World of Warcraft. The first few episodes have contained a few gaming jokes that I didn't get, but have largely been just really funny. Definitely take a look.

Abandon ship! Moderates and children first!

2009-04-28T10:52:00.000-07:00

Interesting political news today: Arlen Specter will be running as a Dem in his re-election bid next year. I don't really see his move as a change of heart at all, but just an acknowledgment that he isn't welcome in the GOP anymore. He seems to be jumping ship in anticipation of not being rightwing enough for the next PA Republican primary. That's probably true, since the GOP is tolerating less dissension than ever.

I don't think this really changes the dynamic in the Senate; I expect Specter to vote in the same way as he has been. With a history of bucking the GOP party line, I doubt he will suddenly begin towing the Dem party line. That's why I don't understand some of the complaints I've seen that he has somehow hoodwinked the people who voted him into office. It's not like any of them thought they were voting for someone who wasn't a moderate.

I'm personally not estactic over this. I'm not a huge fan of one-party rule so I'm not interested in the dissolution of the Republican party. I would rather that the GOP was not so shitbag crazy, and so was a viable opposition party. Losing a prominent moderate has not helped that, but maybe it will promote some much needed soul-searching within the party.

Drawing Software and Gifts from Google

2009-04-21T22:21:00.000-07:00

I've been kind of bored lately and thought that I might try to begin some sort of new creative outlet. Among other ideas, I decided to see if I can find some decent drawing software and do whatever comes to mind. So this post contains a question: does anyone know of any good, free drawing/animation software? It doesn't have to be professional quality, I'll just be fucking around.

Now, I did come up with a nice one that I wanted to share. Google once again is on top of things and has a free 3D graphical package called SketchUp. The mechanics are pretty cool. You can use some basic drawing tools (free pen, rectangle, circle) to make plane shapes, then you use another tool to "pull or push" that surface into a 3d object. This is the basic operation. So you can make a long, thin rectangle and then pull it upwards to make a wall. Then you can draw a rectangle on that wall and push it into and all the way through the wall to make a window or door. All of this is done with pretty intuitive mouse commands (for rotating objects or camera angle, etc) without having to remember a bunch of hotkeys. Another bonus is that there is great online support, as befits Google, in the form of Youtube tutorials. Anyway for an example of the output, I've posted a little thing I threw together below:

I'm pretty impressed with SketchUp althought I'm not sure if it's what I'm looking for. It occurs to me that the tight geometric control might be nice for figures for papers. It can export screencaptures to bitmap, jpeg, tif and png so there are LaTeX packages for using the output.

Unshelved

2009-04-17T22:24:00.000-07:00

Thought I would point out to you all the comic "Unshelved." It's a daily comic about librarians and they do a Sunday edition which highlights some particular book. That brings me to this Sunday edition about the George RR Martin novel, The Game of Thrones:

http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20060723

OMG

2009-03-30T22:57:00.000-07:00

There is evidently a video game in which you are Vin Diesel:

http://www.amazon.com/Wheelman-Playstation-3/dp/B000O5K2UO/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2?ie=UTF8&s=videogames&qid=1238478916&sr=8-2

BTW, if anyone wants to buy this for me note that I don't have a PS3, so buy me that first.

PS - Sorry I haven't been posting, but I got discouraged by lack of comments. So comment, damn you!

Watercooler

2009-03-05T15:13:00.000-08:00

Now that the blog is jumpin' with a total of two loyal followers, I thought I would throw open a discussion thread to complain about world events. I have managed to avoid paying much attention to politics recently, but could not escape the recent BS involving Rush Limbaugh, otherwise known as Galactus, Devourer of Worlds. It was somewhere between sad and funny to watch Michael Steele backpedal so furiously regarding his own spot-on comments about the guy.

So, in the interest of a mature and spirited dialog, I suggest you use the comment section of this thread to make up new nicknames for Rush. I'll get the ball rolling with:

Fatfuckula
Sir Heavybottom of Ham
Windus McGasbag
The Unflinching Maw
Piehole
Yellsy, the Talking Anus

Bad check

2009-02-26T11:20:00.000-08:00

I was forwarded the following image today which I'd like to share. Evidently the check below was sent to Verizon by an angry engineer. That's how it was described to me, at least. The memo line is the kicker.

No Contest

2009-02-25T09:09:00.000-08:00

Let me enter the face-paced world of text-based yelling that is political blogging with a few thoughts about last night's address. First, Obama gives a right nice speech. I was expecting a much more somber speech, but he knocked it up a notch with a lot of optimistic rhetoric. The energy was good; I mean, since when is there laughter and hooting during a presidential address to Congress?
He even got some applause from the GOP since they have to clap for Teddy R and no one can say they are against health care. Finally, the notch-up-knocking was in full effect with the little girl who wrote a letter to Congress saying she wasn't a quitter. I usually find it a bit sappy when they have these moments of introducing some ordinary citizen in the audience and telling their story. But you could read in her face what a huge deal it was to that girl and the whole event came off pretty touching to me.

Now the rebuttal. I did a quick flip through the comment section of cnn.com or some such and the best remark I saw compared Obama's speech to Jindal's as "man versus boy." I think this sums it up pretty well. Obama is a very talented orator who is clearly a tough act to follow. But Jindal was abysmal. Not only did he sound like a teenage boy whose voice was about to break, but the speech itself was ridiculous. I can't wrap my head around the cognitive dissonance associated with the Louisiana governnor using Katrina as a warning against a Democratic government. The tone of voice was rather bad as well; I thought he was talking to a three year old.

Well that's my two cents. You can leave your own or higher denominations in the comments.

You win some, you leave some on the bus

2009-02-17T20:12:00.000-08:00

I had a decent day up until about 20 minutes ago. A friend from Caltech came to give an interesting talk at UCLA. Then we went out for some beer and burgers afterwards and caught up on gossip and such. Then I left my cellphone on the bus.

So I'll probably be bugging everyone I know for their numbers to put in my replacement phone. Hopefully I'll get to keep my old number.

Anyway, I've got to go take care of this so, short post today.

Capitalism just doesn't work

2009-02-15T15:49:00.001-08:00

Seriously, I tried to buy three distinct items today at the 3rd Street Promenade (an outdoor mall in Santa Monica) and came back empty-handed. I mean, I left my apartment specifically to spend money at multiple stores and I was let down at each. How can I do my part to alleviate the liquidity crisis if no one will offer the good or service I want to exchange for my cash?

Yesterday afternoon, I had made an online appointment at the Apple Store for today. The Apple Store is worth a post all on its own. In fact, I think it is worth dozens of PhD theses but that would be too much of a digression for now. Anyway, I made this appointment to get my ipod looked at since it stopped working. I went to the Promenade a little early to do some more shopping.

First up, I wanted a few solid colored or tee-ball style long sleeve T-shirts to wear under my myriad short-sleeved T-shirts with ironic sayings and graphics. I am just that fashionable and mature. But no deal. You would think that Old Navy would have an entire department for this but, no, they must be out of season or something.

Second, I thought I would get a digital camera so I could put pictures of my junk on Craigslist. Or maybe just update my Facebook page. It just so happens that the local Circuit City is going out of business and having a clearout sale so I check that out. In theory, I could've bought a camera but the place was such chaos it was nearly impossible to figure out what was in stock or how much anything cost. Also, for some reason, a bunch of sercurity alarms kept tripping in the camera section so that was a disorienting klaxon the whole time. Forget it.

I give up on the camera since my Apple Store appointment is approaching. As I said earlier this place deserves a whole post. The Santa Monica one has four or five rows of seats in the back where the staff lead workshops and brand worship. I go up to the Genius Bar, which is how they describe the high scool kids who plug your broken device in, observe that it doesn't work right, and helpfully suggest that you buy another one. I expected this and chose the option of turning in my old one and a bunch of cash for a new one. But once again, the system breaks down and they do not have the one I want in stock. So I'll have to go back later or just fuck it and buy whatever it is Microsoft is selling these days.

Untitled

2009-02-11T22:15:00.000-08:00

Second day of the blog here. I still haven't mentioned it to anyone so no one's really waiting for this update. Maybe, I won't tell anyone about the blog; the title would make more sense in that case.

Not much to report to the no one who is reading. Well, that's not true perhaps. I have an odd feeling like I've had some type of epiphany or gone through some phase transition this week. But I couldn't really put my finger on it if you asked what I mean. It's like some subtle shift in perspective. I think that perhaps it's that the reality of some upcoming events have begun to sink in for me. Nothing earth-shattering, but important events: in the coming months, I'll be moving and taking a new job and my brother will be getting hitched. That has definitely made me a little pensive. But I feel like I've been quietly making some decisions which I don't know about yet.

Hello World

2009-02-10T20:02:00.000-08:00

Hi there, here is my inaugural post on this minty fresh blog. Not much to say and not sure what exactly I'm going to do with this space or even who I'm blagging at right now. But it's probably safe to expect some geekery, some foul language, and a bunch of bad jokes in the future.